On Personal Autonomy
Recently there have been a lot of discussion pertaining to what is acceptable and what is not acceptable when it comes to the human interaction. Main theme of this discussion has for somewhat “obvious” reasons centered around men mistreating women by their words or deeds. But awkwardly enough, only on rare occasions has the discussion shifted to the opposite side of the court – women mistreating men by their words and/or deeds.
I have spent the better part of my life on the door and it makes me said when I think about all the vile and disgusting incidents of unwanted human contact. Handling different situations and being privy to violence is a “dark” yet inseparable part of the nightlife. When it comes to men they mostly get rowdy and aggressive, but only on rare occasions do they allow themselves to become grabby. It has, in my mind, a lot to do with the fear of “fag” stigmata or at least the inner fear of being misunderstood in a way that will damage your social role and position in the eyes of your peers.
Unfortunately, my worst experiences are with women, who encouraged by the alcohol flooding their bloodstream, become the worst kind of humans – grabby and foul-mouthed barbarians, treating everything in their sight from the minuscule position of their still functioning lizard-brain. it is not the violent outbursts that scare me. It’s the constant need to be on your toes, ready to react to each and every unwanted act of “attention”, which they consider to be funny or at least “wanted” by the object of their drunken desire due to the fact that folk wisdom has spoken of the man as a walking genitalia, that wants what it wants, when it wants and wherever it wants.
When denied their wish, those prime examples of evolutionary decline revert to insults and violent outbursts in order to convey their utmost dismay towards their target. They can’t comprehend that there might ever be a scenario, where their advancements will not be met with in kind approval or at least a lukewarm smile and a wink “that a girl!” Lizard is awake, Lizzie is asleep!
From a personal point of view – I have accepted a long time ago, that I occupy the spot in the “ugly” category of the society. And over the years I have come to be content with my place. But it still doesn’t mean that I welcome unwanted attention. I too don’t much appreciate being grabbed by the genitals or have my head or other parts of the face and body touched without my express approval. Just like unwanted physical contact, i also find it repulsive when someone is trying to expose themselves to me in order to “convince” me to go with the flow or rubbing themselves against me in order to provoke my “inner lust”.
My body is my property. Let me decide what I want or do not want to happen to it. I acknowledge the sad fact, that statistics are on the female side. But it really doesn’t mean, that only males are to blame. Ladies! We can be harassed just as easily as you. So if you want to fight the problem, don’t expel us from being part of the solution merely by stigmatizing us as being inherently part of the problem.